DAMASCUS: Rat dreams of entering Damascus are now nothing more than for the pipes. ‘Alloosh is finished. Abu Muhammad Al-Jawlaani hasn’t been heard from for weeks as rumors persist of his declining health and resort to the comforts of Turkish brothels in Istanbul where he commiserates with such luminaries as George “Captain Kangaroo Sabra” and Ghassan “Shitto” Hitto. Sigh. And now this:
Harastaa: In several pitched battles against terrorists of Jaysh Al-Islam yearning for the comforts of Hell, the Syrian Army continues to rack up victory after victory and progression built upon even more. At the Al-Imaan Fuel Station, Al-Makaasir and Tallat Al-Mashtal, the SAA followed a well-known pattern of pounding the enemy to soften him up and destroy his revetments, followed by swift penetration into the lines of the enemy and extermination. As of 2 days ago, the areas mentioned herein-above were deloused and rendered ratten-rein. The rodents were so shaken by the pulverizing puissance of our army that they left a ton of weapons and ammo behind – certainly enough to gladden the hearts of our militias hungry to skin alive their quivering prey. As I write, the SAA’s crack engineers are now dismantling a network of IEDs and booby traps laid by the smelly vermin. A warehouse was confirmed destroyed with a missile launcher found inside. A command-control/communications center was taken intact with many incriminating CDs inside. Here are the dead rodents who were identified among the 93 confirmed dead:
Saleem Mahmoud Al-‘Umari
Haytham Hassan Diyaab
The rest could not be identified.
Harastaa Al-Qantara: Another mess for the hyenas of Jaysh Al-Islam. A SNAFU for them, really. Another warehouse was destroyed by tank fire, a command and control center destroyed and many weapons seized after being dropped by fleeing rodents:
Raashid ‘Abdullah Al-Nu’aymi (SAUDI ARABIAN SNAKE REPELLENT)
Another 13 could not be identified. 11 were taken prisoner.
Doumaa: 39 rats belonging to Jaysh Al-Islam surrendered to the security services after negotiating for possible amnesty. ‘Alloosh is really tiffed, now. The rats turned over 2 pickups with cannons aboard along with a ton of weapons and ammo. Before that happened, the SAA had to easily kill these:
Mu’aadh Al-Ajwah (Another family on the verge of extinction)
Nawla and Marj Al-Sultaan: A missile launcher was struck dead on by artillery. 4 pickups with 23mm cannons were destroyed along with an armored truck, a bulldozer and a van:
‘Abdullah Al-Hammoori (Rat leader called “Al-Saqr”. “The Falcon”. He should have been called “The Sucker”)
Daarayyaa: The assault is continuing ferociously. A major advance was announced today at 3 axes: The Four Seasons, The Associations and the East Side. This area is being cleansed of the noisome filth of Al-Ittihaad Al-Islaami Li-Ajnaad Al-Shaam.
NEWS AND COMMENT:
Bob the Bear sends this about the Russian passenger airliner:
John Esq. sends this excellent article by Dan Sanchez:
Brandon sends this one about NATO eyesight:DAMASCUS: A FLURRY OF VICTORIES FOR THE SYRIAN ARMY; BRITISH PLANNING INFERIOR AND QUEER by Ziad Fadel