ISIS is so broke it has begun auctioning off hostages from both China and Norway. It is so broke, it’s oil and gas pipelines having been severed by the Syrian Army at Al-Jadhal and other areas around the Al-Shaa’er Mountain in Homs, that it is beginning to take preemptive action to block the Syrian Army from reaching other profitable fuel producing and processing centers. For example, the recent assault on the Dayr El-Zor Air Base using 5 – I repeat, 5 suicide vehicles loaded with Turkish-American supplied explosives. ISIS is so desperate, it sacrificed 298 of its rats taken from a multitude of locations including Al-Raqqa, Tabqa and Iraq in order to block, what is in its view, the menacing movement of the Syrian Army toward the Al-Thayyim Oil Field and its processing plants. Our army is now only 6 kms from the field, a distance which can be covered by a mechanized armored division in a few hours, if that.
Over 6 months have passed without any major assaults on the airbase by ISIS. The base is protected by a massive force including the Republican Guard, Ba’ath Party Vanguards, local militias made up of the Shu’aytaat and Al-Bu-Saraayaa clans and other units of the armed forces. All these are under the command of legendary paratrooper, Maj. Gen. ‘Issaam Zhahreddeen, whose genius in battle has been proven on so many occasions. The air base is fully functional with bombers flying out of it on a daily basis to strike at ISIS positions all over the eastern part of the country.
It is clear that the Caliph of Cockadoodledoo has become paranoid about the future of his degenerate movement. Besides the auctioning of hostages to probably pay his valet for properly folding his silk turban, he has to make good on all the promises of a “better life” which has drawn the multitudes of misguided clowns who actually believe a god would prepare a paradise which looks like something out of a Merry Melodies cartoon in the Sahara Desert.
The attack started yesterday with 5 vehicles (3 cars, 1 van and 1 truck) stuffed to the rim with C-4 and military grade TNT courtesy of the CIA and MIT. This technique is now well-known and viewed as very “ordinary”. There are snipers, marksmen and experienced RPG and Kornet operators always on the lookout for these kinds of vehicles. The 5 all went up in smoke with their drivers screaming bloody Hell as they sniffed the fragrant odor of roasting meat, which, sadly, was their own. Once the truck and other vehicles were neutralized, the rats began an all-out attack at the southern and southeastern sides of the airbase. Once again, the combination of the SAA’s crack Republican Guard, the Ba’ath Party Vanguards and tribal militias was too much for the vermin. Being very well-equipped, the Syrian forces slaughtered the mindless zombies of ISIS racking up a total of 298 carcasses as counted in a post-battle assessment. Over 40 vehicles were destroyed. It was glorious.
Now, why the attack. It’s because our forces are now on the verge of restoring government control to the productive Al-Thayyim oil field and production facilities. ISIS can’t have that and it’s getting help from Erdoghan who, himself, has made a private fortune by taking kickbacks from ISIS for oil permitted to enter Turkey’s black market. Turkey, the NATO member. Nyuk.
In any case, reinforcements were brought up from the Vanguard Base and Brigade 117 to further bolster defenses. As a matter of fact, those reinforcements were instrumental in ejecting the stinking rats from the abandoned missile battalion installation and agricultural building to the south. All these facilities were empty to begin with. Once again, nihilism gets them nothing.
“Gee, Mom! Look at all the rats!”
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