TABQA AIRBASE: We knew it had to come and it came with the wrath of God and Hell – Zorngottes!. 8 wings of Sukhoi 24s and MiG 25s swept down like the wolf on the fold and caught the malodorous, bearded rodents sleeping. But, this time the rats got something even more special than the love and attention of our air force: they got hit with newly-developed thermobaric bombs that sucked their lungs out through the apertures and orifices of their carcasses. We can confirm aerial estimates, combined with on-the-ground assessments, that over 148 rodents were killed by the bombs with many more killed and wounded after multiple strafing by the SAAF. What this means, folks, is that the talk about being over-stretched or strapped for equipment is pure hogwash. The SAAF and SAA are mounting a new campaign to exterminate Obama’s, Erdoghan’s and Saudi Arabia’s rats. I told you about the deliveries at Latakia and Tartous. Go figure. I am ecstatic. The news is pouring in. One report says the SAAF destroyed 13 pickups with 23mm cannons and 5 trucks fully loaded with explosives.
I have reports from our source in Damascus that SAA-MI is recording communications between Tabqa and Al-Bu-Kamaal indicating pure disaster. One statement from Monzer provides that the rats need to airlift out over 200 wounded rodents. Monzer also left me with the lascivious remark: “اعتقد ان الامريكان ربما سيقومون بهذه الاسعافات” Trans: “I believe the Americans perhaps might undertake this medical evacuation”.