Bodies of rodents involved in preparing a mortar after a rocket they were handling exploded killing them all at ‘Uyoon Hussayn. (See report below).
AL-HISSN: Fresh from an astounding triumph in Al-Zaara, the SAA and NDF have liberated over 700 women and children yesterday in the neighboring Christian town of Al-Hissn and Al-Shuwayhid and accepted the surrender of 25 former rodents who asked for consideration under the Amnesty Law. These people gave reports to SANA of widespread religious persecution, denial of right to prayer, theft of personal property and most horribly, the use of human beings as shields against the onslaught of the legitimate Syrian military. The assault on Al-Hissn is taking shape as I write. The orders are to kill all foreign rats.
Also, at Al-Hissn yesterday, the SAA destroyed a van killing 3 of its passengers. No names available.
This is the laureled Krak de Chevaliers at Al-Hissn. It is a remarkable site that outshines the legendary Citadel in Aleppo.
Al-Sultaaniyya: East of Abu ‘Alaayaa, the SAA wiped out an entire pack of 20 filthy rodents calling themselves the “Commandos of Baabaa ‘Amr” (Maghaaweer Baabaa ‘Amr. yawn)
Khaaled Abu Hassan (rat leader)
Jaaber ‘Ali ‘Alwaan
The rest were not named.
Talbeesa at ‘Uyoon Hussayn Village: SyrPer is always delighted to report misfires on the part of the rodents. Yesterday, a pack of rats was preparing a mortar to fire at surrounding villages. Somebody must have mishandled a rocket and caused it to explode. Terrible mistake, really. Won’t happen again because all 6 rats were killed.
The other 2 were not identified as their bodies were blown into smithereens.
Jawrat Al-Shiyyaah in the city: 4 miserable cockroaches surrendered and asked for settlement of their status pursuant to the Amnesty Law.
Al-Qaraabees in the city: The SAA liberated 2 hostages whose names were actually announced:
Siymoon Hassan Ibraaheem (Unusual name. Combination Muslim/Christian)
Also, at Al-Qaraabees, one rat surrendered and turned over close to 50 assault rifles to the NDF. THANK YOU, PRINCE NAAYEF THE ORANGUTAN.
‘Unq Al-Hawaa Village: A reported 11 rats killed and 5 taken prisoner.
Ruhoom: Fighting with no details.
DER’AH: If any of you are concerned about the southern front, let me disabuse you now of any anxiety. The SAA is delivering knockout after knockout here:
Umm Al-Mayaadhen Farms: Yesterday, these insects were transported to Satan’s Zoo in Hell:
‘Abdul-Rahmaan Muhammad Al-Hareeri
Muhammad Bakr Al-Shiblaaq
Ahmad Muhammad Al-Nijm
Muhammad Mahmoud Al-Majaareesh
Muhammad ‘Abdul-Kareem Abu Hasheesh (put that in your pipe)
Moussaa Ghaazi Al-Mahaameed
Muhammad Mansoor Al-Ghaanem
Another 4 could not be identified. No survivors.
Details not in yet, but close to 50 rats were killed yesterday in these areas: Al-Naaziheen Camp, Al-Sultaan Fuel Station near the city and Al-Nu’aymaat.
Rusoom Al-Dhahra and Al-Mudawwara in Al-Lijaat north of Der’ah, a truck loaded with weapons from Jordan was stopped, its driver arrested and tons of rifles and ammunition given to our NDF. Once again, let’s thank Obama and “Prince” Naayef the Slug for the nice contribution to our military effort.
Yabrood: Heavy fighting reported in Al-Qaami’iyya Quarter and Al-Saalihiyya Roundabout. No details.
Yabrood at the Granaries in the direction of Reemaa Farms, the SAA killed these creeping vermin trying to escape:
Abu ‘Umar Al-Leebi (LIBYAN APE MUCOUS)
Our compliments to the Barakaat Family of vermin. We hope your issue enjoy their long sojourn in the flames of Hell.
Dayr Al-‘Asaafeer south of Al-Maleeha: A cache of weapons was uncovered thanks to the help of citizens. All weapons given to NDF and these 3 “rat leaders” were sent to the hot gates:
Another 7 were killed with them.
Al-‘Aaliya Farms in Doumaa: In a high quality operation, a nest of rodents was invaded by SAA and these were killed:
‘Alaa` Al-Karak (rodent leader)
Another 7 were not identified.
Daarayyaa: Crawling sniper-skunk hunted down and killed:
Jawbar: (Near the Health Center) Pursuit of a pack of vermin led to these carcasses:
Abu Bakr Zeey ‘Ali (AFGHAN RUG INSECT)
‘Issaa Al-Birwaan (LIBYAN SKUNK EXCRETION)
Abu Al-Baraa` Al-Najdi (SAUDI APE PEDOPHILE)
Al-Zabadaani at Afrah Village: Former FSA volunteers helped to kill 5 J.N. rodents including their leader:
The other 2 were foreigners not carrying papers.
Khaan Al-Shaykh: Skirmishing with no details.
Zaakiya Village: 5 rodents surrendered in order to become human again.
Yarmook: The PFLP-GC has begun its campaign to extract the terrorist J.N. rodent who have reoccupied part of the camp. We will have more details as they arrive.
ALEPPO: JUST A NOTE TO OUR READERS, THE SAA HAS REACHED ‘ANADAAN AND FIGHTING IS REPORTED THERE NOW.
NEWS AND COMMENT:
Even the Washington Post has to admit that Putin is enormously popular despite what Obama tries to do with the media. Imagine that Putin’s positive rating is the same as Hollande’s negative one!
So, Merkel wants to taunt the bear? Let’s see how cold her winter is going to be:
WILE E. COYOTE MOMENT:
Maria sends this Wile E. Coyote classic. See, men were meant to fly one way or another: