Even when they dress up like Westerners, there is a look of perverse secrecy dominating their lives. The groom to the right bends over to make sure he’s leaving with the right bride.
No matter how hard he might try to cover up the old dishdaasha, gold won’t change the fact that his ancestors of 8,000 years ago wore the same thing. The gold is from India, by the way.
Bandar Bin Sultan, long-time Saudi ambassador to Washington, arch-enemy of the Palestinians, silent partner with every Zionist leader in the quest to preserve Arab oil as a European emolument, rabid Persian hater and self-styled super-spy, felt he had some special cachet to be recognized and honored with an American military assault on Syria. It was his right after all those years of promoting Americana – its blue jeans, regional hegemonic strategies and moderately priced laxatives.
Bandar’s curious affinity for all things simian, (even his phenotype), is no accident. It is said that his father mated with a marmoset. Others insist it was a baboon.
The key event is Bandar’s eerie trip to Moscow to meet Vladimir Putin. It is unusual, to say the least, to have a director of intelligence travel overseas to meet a sitting president of a superpower in a relatively public manner. There were even photo-ops. I do not recall Richard Helms of the CIA ever flying to Moscow to meet Brezhnev – if he did, we are certain it would be kept hush-hush. Not so with the Arabians. You see, what Bandar was not telling Putin was that, besides the 15 billion dollar weapons deal, the promise to forbear on future Chechen terrorist operations at Sacchi and guaranteed Gazprom monopolization of natural gas supplies to Europe, his head was on the line in Riyadh. He was trying to enlist Putin in the campaign to save Bandar’s hairy pelt. Known universally for his empathy, Putin politely said “Nyet”.
Syrian Perspective learned yesterday, during a conversation with a well-informed Syrian who just returned from Abu Dhabi that the talk there is about Bandar’s future – that if he failed to meet the deadline for overthrowing Dr. Assad, how would the Saudis kill him? Although he is King Abdullah the Zombie’s nephew, there would be no protection for him. The king was too old anyways and wolves were howling in the courtyard; each one with an interest in removing Bandar as a potential usurper. That is why Bandar went to Putin and that is why he made public statements about a break with the United States. His meeting with Putin was not a happy one. (It is said that Putin has asked his generals to draw up plans to invade Saudi Arabia). His announcement to the press about a break with America, however, might hopefully reach the American people causing consternation about a possible alienation of two long-time allies and friend. It might even impel some senators and congressman, eager to underwrite a more opulent sinecure, to viscerally denounce Obama’s abandonment of a tried and true friend.
But, Bandar was clearly operating in the Twilight Zone. Americans have no predisposition to cherish a relationship with a country that does not allow Christians to build a church on its sacrosanct sands; a country that does not allow women to drive cars or to travel freely; a country which does not permit alcohol or movies; a country that beheads people for sorcery. In other words, a society as backward as Zinjanthropus. And American congressmen? Why they have all they need from AIPAC.
When Bandar told Putin, in conclusion, that there would be no solution to Syria but the “military” one, he thought at that time that the U.S. was finally going to do the deed. It’s weird, but Bandar’s trip seemed to be almost inspired by Obama: “give Putin a chance to honorably back out of his support for Assad”. If the U.S. knew Putin would not back away, Americans were setting Bandar up for the chopping block. If they didn’t know, then U.S. foreign policy is truly non-existent, as Zbig Brzezinski once suggested.
“Well!”, screamed the angry little boy in the playground. “If you’re not going to let me play quarterback, I’m going home with the football”. Bandar has now done the unthinkable. He is going to forge a new alliance with Zionism and Erdoghan – not exactly the most felicitous of arrangements, but, one that might buy him some time. With P.M. Mileikowski (a/k/a/ Netanyahu) on board and Erdoghan holding up his end in the north, Assad might finally buckle, agree to an interim government and inaugurate the end of the Shi’i Crescent – Iran’s cataclysmic end. Never in history has an ape’s life depended so much on an impossibility.
To save his own skin, Bandar has initiated a plan to pry away from President Assad – his lovely Damascus. If worse comes to even worst (so to speak), Assad might be forced to relocate to Latakia and negotiate his own end through some interim government supervised conveniently by the Arabian monkeys with stalwarts like Ahmad Jarbaa and Captain Kangaroo (George Sabra) leading the cavalcade of stars.
It is starting now in the Qalamoon, the mountain range to the West of Damascus. Towns like Al-Nabak, Yabrood, Ma’loolaa and Dayr ‘Atiyya will soon become as recognizable as Faaloojaa, Tikreet and Kirkuk. (See map below) A huge concentration of Bandar bandits and beheaders, mercenaries and rodents are preparing for the big push on the capital. But there are only ten glitches.
GLITCH NUMBER ONE: The SAA, NDF, Ba’ath Party, and everybody else knows about the Big Bad Push.
GLITCH NUMBER TWO: The SAA now has 80,000 soldiers and militiamen/women linked up from Qunaytra through Doumaa to Al-Nabak. The technology deployed by the Syrian Army with the help of Russia and Iran will be insurmountable. (Note that FSA terrorist ape “Abu Saqr Al-Jawlaani” was killed yesterday by SAA in Qunaytra).
GLITCH NUMBER THREE: Hizbollah is massing forces behind the ISIS and FSA lines in the Qalamoon. There will be no viable retreat once the SAA begins the major offensive. Zabadaani will be enveloped by the SAA, the town’s vermin dressing up like women, hiding in culverts like rats, begging for forgiveness.
GLITCH NUMBER FOUR: Rat concentrations in the Qalamoon are viewed as soft targets for the SAAF with its newly acquired thermobaric bombs to maximize mass vaporization of rodents.
GLITCH NUMBER FIVE: The FSA, the J.N. and the ISIS are now more at odds than ever before. It is expected that the FSA will turn its guns on the ISIS and help the SAA to achieve greater kill statistics. FSA is already negotiating for terms.
GLITCH NUMBER SIX: Syrian Army engineers have set traps for any rodents moving down from the Qalamoon by rigging explosives to bridges and other roads, forcing Bandar’s rat army to use inhospitable terrain to transport assets. This makes it even easier for Hind helicopter gunships to mow down the vermin as they struggle to surmount the well-known rocky surface of this part of the Anti-Lebanon.
GLITCH NUMBER SEVEN: The MI has infiltrated the ranks of the FSA substantially and no movements by this fake army can take place without knowledge of SAA HQ. This also means that ISIS movements are also determinable because FSA forces are in close proximity to them. So sad.
GLITCH NUMBER EIGHT: Russian and Chinese satellite Intel is following events closely from way up. Iranian-manufactured drones are flying high and recording movements of rats all over the Qalamoon. What’s more, hundreds of civilians are relaying information to MoI and to MoD out of a desire to see this infestation obliterated once and for all.
GLITCH NUMBER NINE: The Zionists will not lift a finger to help the ISIS because of an axiom to which the Settler State adheres: No Jewish lives risked for non-Jews. It’s a fact.
GLITCH NUMBER TEN: The Ba’ath Party. No event in modern Syrian history has brought the party more together than this. If Bandar Bin Chihuaha thinks he is fighting some minority groups in Syria – he has a major shock coming. Ba’ath militias (Shabeeba – with a “b”) are fighting the great battles in the Ghouta. Many of our militia members were honorably discharged conscripts and officers who remained in the reserves and are now crushing the rabid rats coming from every direction. We cannot also forget the Ba’ath inspired National Defense Forces who are revolutionizing the SAA’s ability to hold ground. Bandar is up against modern thinking and secularism. The people of Syria will fight to the death to defeat the waves of savages the Saudi Arabian apes send across their border.
We wish you a Happy Beheading, Bandar. ZAF
NEWS AND NONSENSE; SENSE AND NONSENSE; FACTOIDS AND FALSEHOODS:
Does anyone believe the Western Press will publish a denunciation of the Western Press by a Nobel Peace laureate? If you do, then you might want to buy a share of the Zilwaukee Bridge: