JABAL AL-ARBA’EEN: Near the Turkish border. SAA pulled out all the stops and sent Bandar a wet message:
LIWAA’ DIR’ AL-JABAL (SHIELD OF THE MOUNTAIN BRIGADE) YAWN
‘UMAR AL-FAAROOQ BATALLION (YAWN)
THE GATHERING OF BRIGADES OF THE MARTYRS OF SYRIA (DOUBLE YAWN)
THE AL-‘ABBAAS BATALLION (TRIPLE YAWN)
THE KNIGHTS OF JERUSALEM BRIGADES (QUADRUPLE YAWN)
THE HURRICANE OF DAMASCUS BRIGADE (QUINTUPLE YAWN)
FREE FIGHTERS OF THE REVOLUTION (TRIPLE YAWN SQUARED)
REVOLUTIONARIES OF AREEHAA BRIGADE (QUADRUPLE YAWN CUBED)
MAR’UYYAAN BRIGADE (OH, PLEASE!)
BELOVED OF ALLAH BRIGADE (YEAH! SURE! YAWN)
IBLEEN BRIGADE (SEXTUPLE YAWN)
THE ADVOCATES OF JUSTICE BRIGADES (SEPTUPLE YAWN)
SWORDS OF JUSTICE BRIGADE (PRETTY DULL SWORD)
FALCONS OF SYRIA BATALLION (BETTER CALLED VULTURES)
That’s quite a list of heroic terrorist rodents. All these were put in the vaporizer and sent straight to Mephistopheles yesterday. So sad, really. Hate to rain on Obama’s parade. Of the 318 killed and identified, 247 were non-Syrian. Bandar’s people don’t produce, man.
Ahmad Abu-Al-Quroon (He’s got horns. Perfect for Hell)
I have no time to keep writing their stupid names. I’ll go on. If any of you insist on seeing all the names, comment and I’ll finish it. Rats!!
Along with all the great specimens for our anatomy classes, SAA also seized 3 120mm cannons, 12 missile launchers and 4 mortars with rockets. We also took in a Toyota flatbed with the usual Doschka. Nice touch. THANK YOU PRINCE BANDAR AND PREZ. OBAMA. The rodents were caught hiding in Al-Ba’aaj Castle and the Al-Qimma Restaurant (Summit Restaurant). They hadn’t quite finished dessert when they were rudely dispatched to another emporium for bitters and ice cream.
Saraaqeb: Almost over here. 47 counted dead. No names because of snipers.
Inkhil: An attack on an SAA road patrol went seriously awry when Syrian soldiers refused to be shot at. In the course of the melee, the killed all 6 rodents. No names available.
Izra’: Fighting with no details.
Umm Al-Lughoos north of the Al-Anwaar Association. No details.
Al-Hiraak: At the Naahita Road:
Muhammad ‘Abdul-Razzaaq Al-Khamees
Baasel Muhammad Al-Ahmad
‘Itmaan: Another miserable attack by varmints on a checkpoint. No luck.
Ahmad Saaleh Al-Jum’ah
Ahmad Al-Turshaan (May the deaf be healed in the flames of Satanic retribution)
Mu’ammar Muhammad Al-Massri
Mundher Ahmad Al-Massri
‘Alaa’ Muhammad Muzyad Al-Massri
HURRAY! HURROO! THE AL-MASSRI FAMILY HITS THE HAT TRICK!! GOOD SHOW. YOUR CLOWNS ARE NOW PLAYING FETCH WITH CERBERUS.
Fighting in Nawaa (liberated) and Al-Shaykh Sa’ad with no details.
Al-Hujjayra: Another martyr for Satan bites the dust with his trusty sidekick:
Khaaled Al-Jubayraat (“Abu-Saddaam”, JORDANIAN ROACH THORAX)
Al-Dhiyaabiyya: SAA crushes rodents:
Bakheet Al-Daamer (SAUDI PIG VOMIT)
Ma’loolaa: Remnant rodents found skulking around this Christian citadel:
AL-RAQQA: CONFIRMED DEATH OF SAUDI APE AFTER BEING SHOT BY CHRISTIAN WOMAN FOR ACTS OF SODOMY!!
Boy, I’m sure his mom is proud. He was blown away by a Christian woman he used like some catamite. She got him in the end. According to my sources, he called himself “Al-Saadeq Al-Najdi Bin Wahhaab”. Described as a “nutcase” (read: psycho), he preyed on minority females claiming they were earthly “houris” to sate the sacred appetites of Muhaahedeen. This Christian woman whose name is Joumaanaa took it only so long and put him to death as he slept. She fired 12 shots into his abdomen and groin catching him at an opportune moment as he awakened to learn he was taking a trip to another intestinal track somewhere in Hell itself. Look at that smile on his face. Good show, Joumaanaa. She is now in hiding.
HUGE DEMONSTRATIONS IN TURKEY AGAINST ERDOGHAN RESULT IN USE OF TEAR GAS
NEWS, COMMENTARY AND THE USUAL FOLDEROL:
Dr. Assad’s interview nicely done with Russian News in English:
Chris sends this delicious article about the U.S. losing two missiles to Russian anti-missile defenses in the Mediterranean. Great stuff:
Anon sends this report supporting Chris’: