SECOND POST – DECEMBER 16, 2012 – AWARDS SUNDAY; A BIG DAY FOR WINNERS

SECOND POST – DECEMBER 16, 2012 – IT’S AWARDS SUNDAY; A BIG DAY FOR MANY LUCKY PEOPLE

The Board of Governors of Syrian Perspective has voted on the nominations for several awards to be distributed today to the winners.  The first award is the IMELDA MARCOS PRIZE FOR DILLY-DALLYING.  This award is given only to women in recognition of the singular act of performing only frivolous tasks and, otherwise, doing absolutely nothing.  The IMELDA MARCOS PRIZE singles out prominent women who, like our beloved Imelda, excel in collecting shoes, pumps and stilettos without ever donating a single pair to a needy family.  Imelda’s famous aside to an aide, in 1965, remains the motto by which her reign as Queen of the Philippines will be enshrined.  She said: “Let them eat Naugahyde”.

Here she is in all her regal bluster, belting out her famous hubby’s WWII anthem, “Huk! Huk! The Mindanao Shuffle”.  Her name is synonymous with “trifle”, “trivial”, “nothing”, “vacuous” and “irrelevant”.  

This year’s recipient of the IMELDA MARCOS PRIZE is a person who will go down in history as having done absolutely nothing.  People may be shocked by this assertion, after all, she has been on more planes as Secretary of State than any other predecessor, including the peripatetic, but equally bloated,  Madeleine Albright, whose sudden discovery in the Czech Republic that she was “of Jewish descent” had most trivia- watchers visiting emergency rooms for a dose of Demerol.  She has also been responsible for more Syrian deaths than the Black Plague of the 14th Century.      

And here she is: the most underachieving woman of the year 2012.

 
“Come on down!”, she screams.  Her tenure as Secretary of State will be remembered as something akin to a morning game show watched in trailer parks around the country by matronly prostitutes and bowling alley barmaids.  
Hillary’s accomplishment of doing absolutely nothing memorable during four years of racking up frequent flyer miles at the expense of the American taxpayer; supporting Al-Qaeda in Syria; assassinating her own ambassador in Libya and dodging “Kefauver-style” Senate hearings over that same fiasco in Benghazi, has catapulted her to the very top of the list of women who are best described as talking air bladders.  She asserts she will be stepping down this year.  But, we ask: “Stepping down from what?”  
Because the IMELDA MARCOS PRIZE exalts the pursuit of nothing, the prize is appropriately enough: NOTHING!  Mrs. Clinton will be proud to receive nothing in the mail and can wear it graciously wheresoever she goes.  Congratulations,  Mrs. Clinton, for absolutely nothing.  We will try to remember you.