FIRST POST – JULY 9, 2012 – SYRPER’S PERSPICACIOUS PREDICTIONS ARE INFALLIBLE. TAKE NOTE:
ORACULAR PREDICTION NUMBER ONE: If you thought the U.S. embassy in Baghdad was one white elephant, you ain’t seen nothing. We at SyrPer always knew that American plans for post-Saddam Iraq were ridiculous and explainable through two factors: 1. American ignorance of the region and 2. Neo-Conservative wishful thinking about the nature of Iraqi society. Well, we have another big surprise and it’s coming soon to a theatre near you:
In this collector’s item of a photograph, the Iraqi prime minister forces a smile after being told his Sunni nemesis, Tareq Al-Hashemi, had fled to Kurdistan and asked for asylum.
IRAQ WILL SOON GIVE UP ON ITS U.S. CONTRACTS FOR MILITARY HARDWARE AND GO TO BOTH RUSSIA AND CHINA. There is no question that the Syrian model has impressed the Iraqi general staff and talks have already begun for the purchase of the Russian air and sea defense systems. The Iranians might want to get their hands on American F-16s for reverse engineering, but the process has been so slow Iraqis may forego American technology and negotiate instead for the MiG31-B or a Sukhoi ground attack bomber.
ORACULAR PREDICTION NUMBER TWO: Blundering oaf P.M. of Turkey will be overthrown, arrested and tried for treason by the Turkish armed forces.
In this incredibly prescient photo, a future Erdoghan is seen making the “Pledge of Allegiance” during his political amnesty ceremony at the White House.
It’s well known that southern Turks are fed up with Erdoghan’s idiotic policies toward his neighbors to the South. What is not well know is that Turkish military officers despise him for his misconceived efforts to draw Syria into an unnecessary and costly conflict while alienating virtually every secularist in the country. Erdoghan is the Mr. Bean of the Eastern Mediterranean and he will be soon ousted in favor of someone more likely to follow in the path of Ataturk. Syrian military officers still enjoy excellent relations with their Turkish counterparts and there is talk that the GREAT COLONEL RIAD AL-AL-AS’AD might truly go back to his homeland on the back of a donkey and straight to Palmyra Prison! Wouldn’t that be jolly?