THIRD POST – SYRPER WEEKLY BRAINTEASER

THIRD POST – JUNE 1, 2012 – SYRPER’S WILDLY POPULAR WEEKLY BRAINTEASER.  YOU ARE NOT PERMITTED TO USE A DICTIONARY OR ANY ASSISTANCE.  ANYONE WHO CAN PASS THIS TEST WILL HAVE USED SUCH INSTRUMENTALITIES AND WILL, THUS, BE DISQUALIFIED.  WHILE A GREAT GRAND PRIZE AWAITS THE WINNER, THERE WILL BE NO WINNER BECAUSE THIS TEST IS TOO DIFFICULT FOR ORDINARY MORTALS.

 1.  “Victuals” are pronounced:

a.  Fictuals.  It’s really a German word;
b.  Viktshoowalz;
c.  Vittles;
d.  Vercingetorix;
e.  None of the above.

2.   The Beatles, to a man, are:

a. Jordies;
b. Manchurians;
c. Neutrinos;
d. Scousers;
e. Cockneys.

3. Who is universally considered to be the “stupidest” athlete of this and the 20th Century?

a.  Gordie Howe;
b.  Johnny Weismuller;
c.  Mike Tyson;
d.  Henry Cooper;
e.  Lawrence Welk.

4.  Who was known as “The Light of the Aryans”?

a.  Adolph Hitler;
b.  Mahatma Ghandhi;
c.  Thomas Alva Edison;
d.  Mohamed Reza Pahlevi;
e.  Omar Bashir.

5.  Barsac, a wine from the south of France is:

a.  Sweet;
b.  Medium sweet;
c.  Light with fruity tones and a full tannin finish;
d.  Red with woody notes accompanied by plums and kumquats;
e.  Sooty with aftertaste of sheep manure.

6.  There is a grape wine made in Pago Pago, what is it called?

a.  Pago-swill;
b.  Polynesian Pauillac;
c.  BoolaBoola Bali Hai Tonic;
d.  Pago-Poop;
e.  Pago Stick.

7.  The greatest cause of death for Iraqi presidents since Independence is:

a.  Dodging bullets;
b.  The noose;
c.  Trap doors;
d.  The axe;
e.  All the above.

8.  In the movie, Mars Attacks!, what finally killed the alien invaders was:

a.  American cooking;
b.  English cooking;
c.  Watching baseball games;
d.  Watching golf;
e.  Listening to American country/western music.

9.  Barack Obama is related to Mitt Romney by one very important factor, what is it?

a.  Obama is a practicing Mormon when he’s not going to Protestant churches;
b.  Obama’s mother is Mitt Romney’s great grandaunt;
c.  Mitt Romney slept with Obama at Harvard;
d.  Both Romney and Obama were Affirmative Action freshmen;
e.  Both Romney and Obama are charlatans. 

10.  Dom Perignon is to French Champagne what Prince Hamad of Qatar is to…..?

a.  Claustrophilia;
b.  Copraphagia;
c.  Schistosomiasis;
d.  Psoriasis;
e.  Child molesting.

Don’t forget: it’s impossible to pass this test without cheating, so, don’t expect any prizes.