A DAY OF LAUGHTER – SARCASM AND BLACK HUMOUR;

September 16, 2011 – Another Friday.  But, its funny, the demonstrations seem to have dwindled down to a dozen people here and there, mostly in little towns like Daraya – hardly worth publishing anything about.  But the slavic-zionist NYT does anyway. I’m glad people are sick of these useless displays of sterile anti-minoritarian hatreds. I still believe, however, that returning the bodies of some dead people to their families is wrong because of the danger of post-mortem mutilation.  I refer my readers back to the suggestions I made about cremation, pulverisation, fertilizer production and medical school anatomy classes. We could even borrow a page from the Egyptian security people who used acid to break down the tissue of cadavers which inconveniently wound up in their custody.

I have some great news. This pathetic example of an asylum seeker, “Col. Hussein Hantoosh”, who recanted all his statements to the western press concerning Syrian army orders to kill civilians, appeared on Syrian T.V. yesterday and spilled his guts in a manner that has now convinced me that the Syrian army desperately needs to upgrade its psychological assessment programme or it runs the risk of commissioning officers as egregious as this boring little “zmik”.  He came back from Turkey either because the Turks couldn’t find any country to accept him or he figured he might have a better chance with the Syrian authorities.  He will be tried for treason, dereliction of duty and desertion.  His sentence will be reduced because his later acts were in mitigation of the damage he has done, albeit minor.  Some people have suggested cynically that the Turks exchanged him for some PKK members in Syrian custody. 

I want to reiterate that this Colones Hantoosh is nothing but an honey-dipper in a mosque in Jisr Al-Shughour.  Major Abu Hilal (retired) told me he had never heard of this so-called colonel and that he sounded like some staff sergeant with wanderlust.  In any case, the BBC, hilariously referred to him as a “top” officer.  Well, BBC, you’ve goofed again because of your need to serve the interests, not of the public but of MI6 and that fictional weasel, Rami Abdelrahman.  My wife and I had many laughs at the testimony of “Colonel Hantoosh”.  He looked pretty serious in the way he described the enemies of the Syrian state as “liars” and “hypocrites”.  It was nice that he also denied that the Syrian command ever issued order to kill civilians. 

But even more hilarious is that sorry bunch of stagnant trunks pretending to form a government in exile during their most recent act of sedition in Antalya, Turkey.  They claim to have elected 140 members to their gaseous parliament in the sky – 70 elected out of the exile community with the suggestion, oh so sinister, that the other 70 are in Syria which explains why they cannot disclose their names.  Wow!  You mean there are senators in-waiting and the Syrian intelligence services know nothing of them?  Or maybe they have elected fantasy senators – ones with names that don’t exist or people who died of natural causes?  I don’t know.  All I do know is that treacherous snakes like Basma Qadmani will never see Syria in her lifetime lest she relishes the noose prepared for her over some hole appropriately dug for her carcass.  The sight of these constipated suits with their declarations of having invited members of minority groups who have expressed fear that the sunni classes will discriminate after taking power has set us all on fire with gastric evulsions of guffawing and hooting.  What a hoot, indeed.  They will be lucky if they’re allowed to return to Syria one of these days as members of the Baath Party. 

Anthony Shadid is taking his singularly unique style of lying now to Bahrain. I wish the Shi’ites of that country luck after this speckled hedgehog gets done with them.  Oh, his wife, Nada Bakri thinks she can sneak into Syria anytime she likes – or – she makes up stories inspired by her charlatan husband.  His narrative will not have an happy ending.

The Iraninan Arabic language channel, Al-‘Alam had an interesting report about the misinformation campaign against Syria yesterday.  There were pictures of that sedentary Humpty Dumpty Amir of Gutter, Prince Tabl Ibn Tablayn Zawj al-Mawzaaya which were selectively unbecoming.  There was one photo of Prince Fatso in which he looked like an Arabian ogre eying a child for breakfast.  What a beast!  What an ugly race of lazy, shiftless, feckless dreck.  I shall talk to you again after some calls to Syria.  By the way, no demonstrations today in Latakia, Tartous, Banias, Hama or Qamishli.  Don’t believe the agenda-driven “human rights” scum inventing these stories.  Ziad Amin Abu Fadel.