Anthony Shadid: Fiction Relayed as Fact

July 26, 2011- Just got back from a session with this Lebanese oyster-head charged with violation of a Personal Protection Order.  As he and I engaged in some preliminary discourse to settle the boundaries of his education, I asked him if he could speak in Literary Arabic.  He answered in the affirmative.  While I had my doubts at first, it took no time to realize that the bloke was illiterate.  He could neither read nor write.  When the judge warned him about “perjury”, I used the legal term “Hinth” to no avail.  I had to use “Shahadat Zoor” to convey the idea of legal perjury. I’m in the mood for a Campari and soda right now.  It’s a hot day here in Michigan.  I need something to slake my thirst after hours of whispering in the ears of that cobbler from Bint J’Beil.   I shall excoriate Shadid tomorrow and lay bare his suspicious origins.  Adieu.  Ziad.