SYRIAN GOVERNMENT OFFERS “ADOPT A TERRORIST RAT”

“WE NEED A HOME. WILL YOU TAKE US IN?

 

THE SYRIAN GOVERNMENT HAS IMPLEMENTED A NEW POLICY DESIGNED TO ADDRESS THE HUMANITARIAN CONCERNS OF MANY: WHAT TO DO ABOUT FOREIGN TERRORISTS CAPTURED BY THE SYRIAN ARMY?

With the Amnesty Program moving apace in the country giving young men a second chance at a normal life,  thousands have availed themselves of the opportunity to transmogrify from rodents into human beings.  But what about captured terrorists from foreign countries?  Don’t they count for anything? ……….Sure they do.

The Syrian Ministry of Foreign Affairs announces a new program designed to repatriate captured terrorists from the following countries: United Kingdom, Australia, United States, France and Germany, and to offer them for adoption by loving, civilized families. We’re sorry, but, terrorists from countries like Saudi Arabia and Chechnya will have to euthanized and cremated.

Clove Barnacle of Coventry, U.K., plays with her recently-acquired terrorist pet, ‘Abu Falaafel”, in her newly refurbished flat.  “My God, I never knew how nice a local terrorist could be. Why, I wouldn’t know what to do without him. And, he speaks English!”, she purrs.   

Our catalog includes thousands of British, French, American, Australian and German nationals.  They all need a loving home in their country of origin.  Aren’t you willing to provide that to them?

Now and only now, the Syrian Government is prepared to send these terrorists back to their homelands at only a minimum cost to the adopting family.  The Syrian Government guarantees that all terrorists sent to the listed countries will have received rabies shots, Interferon and penicillin injections.  Our foreign terrorists are only rarely without complete body parts – amputations sometimes necessary to save the poor critter’s life.

SUPPLIES ARE LIMITED!!  If you order today, the Syrian Government will send the adopting family an EXTRA TERRORIST!  WHAT AN OFFER!  That’s right.  TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE!! Another terrorist just like the ones in the picture shown at the start of this advertisement.

Don’t be shy.  It’s time you took these terrorists back.  And what better way than by adoption.  Have them in your home.  Listen to these testimonials from adoptive citizens:

“Jeez’o’Pete!  I never knew how great it would be to have my own cannibal in the house. Instead of having to feed him, he finds vermin on my property and eats them. I really like what he does to rats!”  Kazimir Cownofski, Hemp Highlands, New Jersey

Kazimir horsing around with his pet terrorist, Abu-Hummus.

“The wife and me, well, we’re getting up there in years.  Thanks to the Adopt a Terrorist Program, we don’t have to make tea any more. I didn’t know Pakistanis drank tea. So now, Fern and I can relax and let him brew it.”  Smedley Darff-Tetley, Stankblaster-on-Stye, Kent, U.K.

Abu-Arse, says “Hullo” to Smedley every morning before tea. 

THE SYRIAN GOVERNMENT GUARANTEES THE ARRIVAL OF EVERY TERRORIST TO HIS HOME COUNTRY IN HIS OWN PRIVATE CAGE PROVIDED BY THE GOVERNMENT.  Once on his home turf, he is the responsibility of the adoptive family unit or the governmental agency responsible for monitoring his “condition”.

DISCLAIMER:  The Syrian Government, its embassies and representatives, explicitly deny any warranties as to the fitness of any terrorist sent to the above-mentioned countries with regard to domestication or adaptiveness.  In fact, the Syrian Government specifically excludes any consideration for damages in the event the 1. terrorist kills or injures a family member 2. blows himself up in a train station or 3. eats the adoptive family members. Adoptive families have been warned not to permit any adopted terrorist to drive a car or truck.  KEEP TERRORIST PET AWAY FROM FERTILIZER.

This is an advertisement paid for by the NATO ADOPT A RAT IN COUNTRY ORGANIZATION or NARCO.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SYRIAN GOVERNMENT OFFERS "ADOPT A TERRORIST RAT" by
Sort by:   newest | oldest | most voted
Rasheem
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Rasheem

Ziad how many are you adopting?They would be great in the winter to pull your sled thru the snow.

david
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous

ziad, there is talk of a no fly zone being enforced in the south of syria along the jordanian border. your thoughts please. also why is russia working within international law when dealing with these gangsters? are they being naive?. what would they do if a no fly zone was attempted in your opinion?. it is time to take the gloves off with this bunch is it not?

Anonymous
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Anonymous
Umm, they are fighting an Islamic insurgency, so why not use the very clear rules of Islamic warfare as their punishment. 1. If you surrender before fighting has commenced, and you can use this on a battle by battle basis, you are secure 2. If you are captured after fighting has commenced, you are executed. 3. When shooting at the terrorists once battle commences, it is shoot to kill, not wound, warn or scare off 4. For those who surrender, they will be levied jiziya on their heads, a humiliating tax designed to demonstrate submission (paying tribute) 5. If they… Read more »
Quenellette
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Quenellette

Do they come with an on/off button?
Listening to Abu Arse´s “Allahau Akbar” must be extremely annoying…

Jash al hurr
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Jash al hurr

Qadimoon ya yabrood nuhnu jaysh al hurr

Anonymous
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Anonymous

Well, you just lost one sympathizer, not of the Syrian struggle against the wahhabi takfiris, but of your website. The photos you show are from Irak, if I am not mistaken. Many of those who have been tortured and martyred in the occupation prisons at the hands of the American scum were innocents. Suppose that Americans had their way in intervening militarily in Syria and committed this sort of crimes with Syrian innocent citizens, how would you react. An acute case of utter “mauvais gout” of of “Jameson” intoxication.

Anonymous with a sense of humor
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Anonymous with a sense of humor
Don’t be a homo. His whole post is just a joke. He used photos from Iraq (those with a sense of humor spell it with a q), but he didn’t commit any of the acts of torture. He didn’t commit any of the crimes of the terrorists. He is just reminding the public how the Americans treated these same Takfiri / Wahhabi terrorist types. Many innocent Iraqis indeed were killed, and the Kurds cheered on the invasion from the beginning while the Shia, Sunni & Christians resisted. So, blame the Kurds for their lobbying efforts and willingness to always serve… Read more »
Raymond Dillon
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous

I totally agree with you, this parody is in bad taste, besides most of the men that were tortured and killed at Abu Grhaib were Iraqi enlisted servicemen, clearly a violation of international law and the Geneva conventions.
These crimes still needs to be prosecuted.
As for the criminals fighting in Syria – a bullet to the back of the head wether or not they are foreign or domestic.

Mark Twain
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Mark Twain

“Mosques are plenty, churches are plenty, graveyards are plenty, but morals and whiskey are scarce.”

Danny The WP Guy
Admin
Legatus

It’s gallows Humor & Irony sprinkled with Sarcasm!
Should be taken a tad more light heartedly than this 🙂

CHEVI789
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous

Your’e an idiot, we all know the pics are from Iraq, any educated person would know that, Ziad was just making funny jokes, and i laughed, don’t be a softy, grow a pair.

Raymond Dillon
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous

No , i didnt find the humor in it, the men that were tortured out of their minds at Abhu Grhaib were real human beings who fought for their country just like the SAA is fighting for their country today.

CHEVI789
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous

Raymond, i realise they were tortured out of their minds, but Ziad chose to show these pics for one reason or another, as far as i am concerned the west is the biggest violator of human rights, it should practice what it preaches.

Captain_Mustafa
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Captain_Mustafa

Cute puppies up for adaption…ding…ding….ding….

Free world loves Syria
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Free world loves Syria
I’m really sorry for the crimes that terrorists from Europe made ​​in Syria, but please ,please ,please Kill them all! In Europe, vast majority of ordinary people supported Syria and Syrian people in the fight against terrorism and ordinary people was opposed to any foreign interference in Syrian problems (this best seen when whole Europe said “fuck off USA, we do not want to bomb Syria” and it is not far to terrorists return to Europe because their targets are ordinary people rather than politicians, bankers and other scum. Kill them all and let them die slowly and in pain.… Read more »
the Thylacine
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
the Thylacine

Great writing. Bad photos.
These atrocities at Abu Ghraib show one thing: the criminal depravity of Amerika.
But a writer’s funny stuff should not be neutralised by such images. It ruins the joke.
Remember, the cruelties inflicted at Abu Ghraib traumatised the Sunni community and made it easier for the Saudi apes to instigate their subversions, which contributed to the recruitment against Syria.
Personally, I recommend work gangs. Make these scum rebuild what they destroyed, humping rocks in chains. Castrate them: we don’t want ’em to breed, ever.

regards.

biersauer
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
biersauer

Will be a new player in the Fastnacht Procession in Germany,
as an Syrian terrorist alike the pictures above.

LightSaber
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
LightSaber
Not funny. That’s crass. I agree with Anonymous and Raymond 100% – this post clearly shows what’s really wrong with the humanity. The ruling global cabal does not have to seek deep to tap into dark side of human nature – even people supposedly good-natured on the surface like Ziad, when you stress them a little bit show their chauvinism, hatred, disrespect for others, self-conceit. Ziad does not care about people other than his ilk. This just confirms what I have suspected all along – if people in Syria were more concerned with the fate of other fellow Syrians (see… Read more »
Fadi
Admin
Newbie

Abdul Waheed Majeed’s family say they believed he was on humanitarian mission before reports of suicide attack

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2014/feb/14/pictures-emerge-british-suicide-bomber-syrian-children?CMP=twt_gu

Raad
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Raad

Run run . Very funny how rats react ,not ready yet for the martyrdom

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a35_1392458550

Run Forest Run!
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Run Forest Run!

Syria: NDF targeting and killing rebel infantry with ATGMs

Part of channel(s): Syria (current event)

NDF video showing NDF ATGM & heavy caliber fire on islamist rebels in Az-Zarah in Syria.
First time I am seeing NDF use ATGMs against rebels and as we can see they are doing it very good.
Read more about Syrian National Defence Forces here
Location: Az – Zara

Read more at http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=af6_1392474753#PkZ6Dzp2FEIyKFpF.99

National Defense Force whack a Rat!
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
National Defense Force whack a Rat!

The moral effect of the thundering of one’s own artillery is most extraordinary, and many of us thought that we had never heard any more welcome sound than the deep roaring and crashing that started in at our rear.

Fritz Kreisler

things are cool in istanbul/ankara
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
things are cool in istanbul/ankara

Turkish MPs brawl in parliament as Erdoğan wins judiciary vote

Opposition MP taken to hospital after vote to give justice ministry greater control over judges amid corruption scandal
Share234

inShare.3
Email

Staff and agencies

theguardian.com, Saturday 15 February 2014 22.49 AEST

Έγινε Τούρκος
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Έγινε Τούρκος

Youtube Video: Fight Brawl Turkish MPs Turkey Parliament.

One MP was hospitalized with a broken nose!

Anonymous
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Anonymous
The war in syria can end overnight.. if Americans just mobilze and help Syria to be completely Destroyed with hundreds thousands civilians killed by Obama administration and Zionist Republicans. IF American veterans from the IRAQ war decided to Defect from their country (snowden like) and decided to go to Syria and offer their help with the security of civilians ,and Americans show up with their army uniforms and Flag on the media in Syria helping in their security against Alqaeda.. a massive wave of World Wide reports will raise awareness of all Americans and Demand him to attacking Syria ,to… Read more »
Anonymous
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Anonymous
This is the way to end the war in Syria.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bncoipjNSkw But also it will be even more powerful the message to have Veterans from the IRAQ war from US-UK and FRANCE.. in Syria ,not fighting with Alqaeda but helping the Syrian Government. Just 100 – 200 soldiers from US-UK-France will be more than enough to draw all war attention to Syria and make Obama -Cameron and Holande that what they doing is totally wrong and the chain reaction of defections on the military in the west will be unstoppable . No NATO power will bomb Syria knowing the media… Read more »
Anonymous
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Anonymous

Video shows Obama Alqaeda/” moderates” jihadist near aleppo prison is a discourse requesting a union of all terrorist forces and suicide bombers to help them take aleppo prison..

http://youtu.be/REf5L_Y1IK8

Jash al hurr
Guest
Level 0 - Anonymous
Jash al hurr

The Syrian army is getting their ass raped lol

wpDiscuz